Speech Delay and What Else...?

So the verdict is in. Based on the evaluation a few weeks ago, the Speech Pathologist has reported that Doodlebug has a "moderate delay" in expressive communication. This was difficult to hear, but also somewhat of a relief to me since knowing will help us better support him. 

The Good News 

Doodlebug will likely be able to communicate verbally at a level appropriate for his age with therapy sessions and some strategies we can use to communicate with him at home. The therapist is confident that his ability to achieve that goal is excellent with a few months of therapy. We've had two sessions so far and I can already see a difference. Doodlebug has started saying some two word phrases like "cat eat" "more orange" and "more car car". He has also started noticing verbs (other than eat and read") like "cook" and "play". 

Doodlebug and his "unusual interest in letters"

The I-don't-know-what-to-do-with-this-yet News

Of course, there was more to the report. The evaluator mentions that there were some common autism characteristics that she observed - only answering to his name some of the time, preference to play alone and his high interest in letters, numbers and colors at his age. I had noticed those traits in Doodlebug a while ago, but we had always dismissed any concerns by thinking those were normal traits for a two-year-old boy. But maybe not?

I had convinced myself that some traits I noticed were normal for a two-year-old (or at least normal for Doodlebug), like his fussiness at his 2nd birthday party or his very long warming up period for strangers. Large crowds and unexpected changes have always overwhelmed our sensitive little guy. I never wanted to make a big deal about that though. My feeling is that I'm not going to force my kids to socialize or to act like other kids. It's great that some kids like to play with other children, hold hands with them and sing and dance with them. My child does not. It's nice if your child will go with the flow around a new adult, babysitter, etc. Mine will not. He struggles with new people, he wants familiarity. If you're disingenuous or in a bad mood, my child senses it and stays far away from you. If he were an adult, we would considered him to be a good judge of character! 

I'm feeling so many mixed emotions going into these evaluations/ therapies - hopeful, scared, anxious, but mostly overwhelmed right now. I'm due with our second baby in 10 weeks and I'm worried about giving Doodlebug all the extra attention he needs right now while trying to prepare for Ladybug's arrival. I guess I better start improving my juggling routine. 

Speech Delay or Normal Distracted Two-Year-Old?

My first hint that Doodlebug might be falling behind developmentally was months ago when he was still going to full-time day care. At pick-up one day, I knelt down to say hello to one of his friends (another little boy who is only one month older than Doodlebug). "Where's Doodlebug?" I asked the little boy, expecting him to point or say "there". Instead, he replied, "He's right over there." A perfectly comprehensive 4 words sentence that I couldn't imagine Doodlebug saying even months from now.

Over the next few months,  I've tried not to worry, but instead to celebrate Doodlebug for who he is. I thought staying home and having more one-on-one time with me would help him develop speech better. I've always heard other parents say that their child just started talking one day or that their child changed so much in just one month. So I guess I was crossing my fingers and hoping that's what would happen for Doodlebug.

November came and went and then December and the holidays, too. It seemed like Doodlebug's speech hadn't advanced at all. He has learned new some new words. My little guy knows all the letters of the alphabet, all the colors of the rainbow, numbers from 1 to 13 and even many shapes. But don't ask him to tell you what he's doing, ask for what he wants or talk about a book in even a two-word phrase. Because he won't. He has not seemed to grasp the idea of verbs, his speech has just not advanced to that point yet.

Maybe this is normal. I don't know. I do know that I watch other kids his age and most of them speak in sentences and listen and respond when spoken too. Tomorrow we will have the first of numerous evaluations. Maybe Doodlebug is totally normal and I'm expecting too much, or maybe he does have a developmental delay or disorder. Either way, I'm looking forward to getting some answers and perspective.

No matter what happens, I know he will still be my lovable little man with his squinty-eyed smile and his sweet kisses. NOTHING can ever change that. But I have to admit, I am feeling nervous and holding my breath tonight.